Remember the good old days when someone would actually formally ask you to be in a relationship? Even if it was in 7th grade when you received a note passed in class but it was still something more tangible than dating in your 20's in 2018. Maybe my friends and I are the only ones feeling this way but it normally goes a little something like this...
you swipe right on a cute guy from a dating app. YOU'RE A MATCH!
you message him a flirty GIF.
you flirt on the app for a few days.
you exchange phone numbers and start texting.
you both agree to go out for a drink.
(he bails or you bail)
you get to the bar and totally hit it off.
(or you don't hit it off and/or realize he's a creep or you're awkward AF)
you plan for a second date.
(he bails or you bail)
second date, you realize he's normal and you both get along.
(nope, he's a creep... RUN!)
third date, you have your first kiss or you go home with him (i'm not judging)
(oh it's awful... RUN!)
fourth date or fifth? 5 1/2 date because you slept over?... Netflix and chill counts as a date?
(his living habits are gross AF... RUN!)
AND NOW YOU'VE BEEN HANGING OUT FOR A MONTH OR LONGER BUT YOU'RE NOT IN A RELATIONSHIP.
Welcome to LIMBO DATING where you both have too much pride to get into a real relationship because you never know if something better will come along. (so stupid, in my opinion!)
Here comes the fun part; you talk all the time but neither one of you wants to commit.... why is that? Because you want to keep your options open in case something better comes along? But you TOTALLY get along and click so well, why wouldn't you agree to just date/be in a relationship? Because the last relationship was a damn nightmare and let's just not repeat that? BUT.. you guys go out all the time, you're only dating each other and no one else (are you though?) But what if you are the one to bring it up to him and he says, "I just want to have fun and not take things so seriously." So why won't he commit? I'm not saying it's always the guy but in my own experience, it has been. (btw man-children all SUCK aka guys who won't grow TF up!) Maybe he's still hung up on his ex and you can see all of their old pictures on Instagram and Facebook.
SIDE NOTE: * also I realize that there's this thing called Cuffing Season that I should probably mention too which is new to the vocabulary of dating in 2018 as well. Cuffing Season is when you 'date' someone during the cold months because you like a warm body next to you in bed and right around spring weather, you break up because you don't realllly like that other person. This isn't shit that I just made it, this happens SO OFTEN!* END RANT... PLEASE CONTINUE READING...
My explanation as to why these guys won't commit; they are man-children. What exactly is a man child? OH LET ME TELL YOU! A man child was once a great guy in his early years until he had his first real relationship or maybe a very serious one recently which turned out awful for whatever reason. Now he has a chip on his shoulder and he doesn't want to commit and why should he? He has women at the flick of the wrist from a few thousand dating apps and websites. Who needs to commit ever again? Who wants to get hurt again? Not you, Chad! (also; a 'Chad' is the generalization of a millennial man-child's name, not any specific person named Chad) HENCE WHY DATING IN 2018 IS SUCH A BITCH. Also, girls can be un-committing too, I just don't hear about it as often but it does happen!
Obviously I'm completely overgeneralizing here but the last few guys that I have dated all had this issue. ALL OF THEM. Then you start to think, maybe it's me? Am I the issue? I can only tell you a million bazillion times that you're not the issue whatsoever but you probably won't listen to me. Watch any of the opening scenes of a freaking Rom Com movie when the girl gets hurt by some douche bag in the beginning and then this prince charming guy comes to sweep her off her feet in a quirky little way. Sometimes you have to date a handful of douche bags before you find that prince. We know that but it's just a rough cycle we actually have to endure, for some others it's quite comical or maybe that's just me.
Now I'm not saying my current relationship status is in limbo land because it's not and I'm sure that story is for another day. This blog post is speaking to the women who are frustrated by the current 2018 realm of shitty dates because I empathize. Dating sucks sometimes, I've been in single mode for a long time. You just need to be open to meeting new people instead of going to the same 4 bars expecting to meet a new person or stop being SO picky. That's my only advice, also get your ass off your couch and GO meet NEW people instead of waiting for someone to show up to your door step or recycling through your exes. Maybe you should amp up your dating game and stop going on the same 2 dating apps and TRY something a little bit more serious like an actual dating website or going to networking events to meet NEW PEOPLE.
ALSO: Not all guys are jerks (I'm in a new relationship and he's a sweetheart *heart eye emoji*) Some guys want a serious relationship too, you just need to find those guys so start taking your dating game as serious as you take your night time face regime! STEP THAT SHIT UP and if you hate it, try something else.
So my rant is; if you hate dating as much as I did... try appreciating your single life more and stop settling for less than you deserve. APPRECIATION SINGLE LIFE POST... COMING SOON! ALSO... differences between dating in San Francisco vs. New York City... COMING SOON! so please stay tuned because you'll want to hear this FOR SURE!